I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Randomize
