some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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