i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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