BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Hippo gnu deer
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
