just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
she looked like the before picture.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
