Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
