i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
