problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize
