Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
