dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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