We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
We are two peas in an std pod
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Randomize
