worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize