You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
this just has baby written all over it
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
