So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
