its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
