Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
