One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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