Non-Jews are for practice
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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