I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
