You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize
