i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I smell like Dick and happiness
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
