You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Randomize
