Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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