If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
did you just send me my own nude
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize