the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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