it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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