If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
