Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
