i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
