A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
its not stalking. its research.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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