Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
did you just send me my own nude
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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