69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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