I must be too annoying 4 u.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize