ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
