Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
