she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
It was a blind-side dick pic.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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