sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Randomize