Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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