We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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