Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize
