I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
