therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Randomize
