I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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