its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
