You just made me feel so damn special
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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