He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize