Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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