I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
