My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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