She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
i think i scared a bird with my dick
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize