idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
